26 March, 2009

Stay married and save the planet

Staying married is better for the planet because divorce leads the newly single to live more wasteful lifestyles, an Australian lawmaker said.

Senator Steve Fielding told a Senate hearing in the Australian capital Canberra that divorce only made climate change worse.
When couples separated, they needed more rooms, more electricity and more water. This increased their carbon footprint, Australian Associated Press (AAP) quoted Fielding as telling the hearing on environmental issues.

“We understand that there is a social problem (with divorce), but now we're seeing there is also environmental impact as well on the footprint,” AAP quoted him as saying.

Such a “resource-inefficient lifestyle” meant it would be better for the planet if couples stayed married, he said.

During the hearing, the senator read out quotes from a U.S. report that advocated his stance.

Fielding, who leads the independent Family First party, grew up in a family of 16 children and has been married for 22 years, his website says.

21 March, 2009

How to be honest with others

You might say, “Well I sure do not need this How To. I am very honest and direct with everyone in my life!” Oh are you? So you have never told a “fib,” “a little white lie,” or “stretched the truth” in your entire life? You must be very unique--or lying. What you need to do is to take a sincere look at how you interact with others to determine how honest you really are with these three dishonest interactions .

Instructions : Step1-- Watch your social interaction with others over the next week and pay close attention to the “honesty meter” in your brain. Look for the any dishonest interactions you have with the people with whom you engage. See if you used: White lies, stretching the truth and/or fibs. Look at tips below for definitions of these three dishonest interactions.

Step2-- Be honest with yourself in your self-assessment of how you interact with others. Do use white lies to avoid conflict? Do you stretch the truth so as not to get the other party upset? Do you fib so that you do not have to face something you did wrong which you do not want to admit to?

Step3-- Clarify for yourself why you are dishonest with others. Once you identify if you have performed any of the dishonest social interaction described in Steps 1 & 2. Figure out why you were dishonest and decide if it would be better for you to be honest in the future in similar social situations.

Step4-- Make a commitment to be more honest in the future. People around you have an inner sense and can tell when you are not being totally open, transparent and honest with them. Remember, your best job of “trying to keep a happy face” is not always accepted in the manner in which you hope it will be accepted.

Step5-- Learn how to become more assertive in your relationships with others. This will help you tell them where you are coming from and why you feel and act with them the way you do. Being assertive will help you achieve commitment to being honest and open with people.

Step6-- Grow in the ability to be open, honest and assertive with others. Your family members, friends, work colleagues and associates will appreciate an “honest straightforward you.” They will appreciate your ability to have candor, directness and sincere feedback rather than your efforts to hide the truth so that they can be happy, content or “in the dark.”

Tips & warnings Three dishonest interactions with others

White lies: You will tell people what they want to hear rather than what is really going on. The reason for the white lie is that you want to make them happy, relaxed and content with how their lives, work or life circumstances are going and you do not want to “rain on” their parade with the truth about how things are really going on.
For example: On the job you found out that your monthly target goals have not been met, but you do not want the boss to know today because you want the boss to let you out early so you can get over to that big sale at the mall. This self-serving dishonesty is still dishonesty, no matter how you try to polish it off.

Stretching the truth: You will tell some of the story but not the whole story so as not to upset, disturb or depress people with the whole “stinking truth!” For example: Your friend is on a diet and really not losing weight. Well you say: “Wow! You're looking great! It is amazing how smaller you look already!” Ok, so you want to encourage your friend to stay on the diet but you are not being honest. Aren’t friendships and relationships built on honesty?

Fibs: You will “kid around” or “make light” of situations or circumstances without telling the truth about what is really going on, so as not to bring down, dampen, or depress the mood of the social situation in which you are fibbing.
For example: Your friend just tells you that she broke up with a friend of four months and you say: “Oh honey you will do just fine! He was a rat and it was only a matter of time till he would show his true colors.” Hmm, your friend is feeling rejected, isolated and alone and you are trying to do a job of “cheering up” but in reality you are being dishonest about the situation which in the long run can assist your friend to have extended bereavement over this breakup than if you had been honest from the get-go. Just say: “How sad it must be for you since you were so sure this was the one!”

Source: ehow.com